Friday, June 22, 2012

Bill & Jud The Rest of The Story

Okay you need to check out OldDogNewTits.com and read the continuing story of the brothers, Bill and Jud. Two brothers who mistakenly sent their e-mail exchanges to OldDogNewTits, too, and she just had to share.

When the story ended, she had a contest, asking her readers to continue it.
Here is my submission


Bill,
Remember the moms I got thrown out of the baseball game last week? Who knew they would come back? Apparently there is some fancy new thing called Groupon, or something, where people spend money they don't have on stuff they don't need, like a month's worth of seats to Dollar Night at the damn baseball games righttheHell next to me! And let me just tell you this, my brother, those baseball moms are a bitter bunch of biddies! Hellfire, I hadn't but barely took the first sip of my dollar beer when the biggest one got up in my face about last week like it was all my fault. It's like she forgot Billy and Buddy were even there, and her damn kids were never kicking anyone. Stupid Scooter was no help at all! You'd of thought he had important work to do being the mascot or something. Before I knew what had happened, I was wearing three beers, three little kids were screaming their heads off that I was trying to hurt them, and the cops were hauling ME out of the ballpark! Unbelievable! I think this damn Groupon thing ought to be outlawed, right along with moms traveling in packs with their kids to ball fields. They just ruin the whole game for the real fans who are there for the dollar beers! And I even had my metal detector and my night vision goggles with me to do some serious diamond digging tonight. If I find out those stupid cows ended up with one of my diamonds, they'll be sorry! I'll sic Mrs. J on 'em! She is scarier than anybody!

I gotta ask, Ceviche? Shrimp COOKED in lime? The last time I checked the only thing a lime was good for was sucking after a tequila shot! Pesto? No red meat? Men sitting on your lap at ball games and coming up to talk cooking with you. Dude, I'm starting to worry. Is there anything youse want to tell me? (smile) Try to find yourself some beef soon so that muscle keeps working. (smile again)


Talk to youse soon,
Jud

7 comments:

  1. You did the contest proud ;)

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  2. Where did my comment go? Anyway, I LOVED it. The Groupon thing was hilarious.

    And ... "Shrimp COOKED in lime? The last time I checked the only thing a lime was good for was sucking after a tequila shot!"

    Perfect. You channeled them VERY well. Thanks for playing! :)

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  3. hey wait, what do it do here? i am voting for amy. i'm not sure for what, but doesn't matter because she can Lip snic to Journey like nobody's bizness!

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    1. You are hilarious!
      Thanks for the vote! I think you have to actually go to her site and click on the pop up box, though!
      Journey Forever!

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  4. Voted for you Amy. HUGS! Love ya.

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